Fact // found on the CampRock Soundtrack. iWant to go to a cool camp like that! lol. But for me, this song represents the end of summer- but the beginning of something greater. "Gone are the days of summer, and we couldn't change them if we tried. But why would we wana? Lets go where we gota- our paths will cross again in time." So here's a toast to the past & kiss for the future .

Really?aSenior!?
Wow.
That's the best way to express it all iThink. Wow. Honestly, just sitting here trying to put thoughts together for this blog as my "Smash Into You" play-list [the best play-list on my ipod right now]- runs, I'm getting watery eyed.

You never truly notice your growth as a person until a random moment. Like sitting on your bed and noticing the posters on the wall; they've been up for 3 years. Or cleaning out your bookshelf and finding old notebooks. I'm like "look how my writing was!" And reading my old journal entries. Finding old projects... [thehappytearsarefallingnow]
iGrew up so much over the past 3 years. Its amazing. I'm no longer that cynicaljerk// now im a suckerforlove That's one of the biggest change for me iThink, falling in love with Derek Loury. Haha. My dreams never changed though- I'm still heavily in love with music.

Please excuse me if my thoughts are all over the place btw; I'm just in awe.
One of the major changes iHave noticed in me- is that iNo longer victimize myself. iUsed to be that girl; the world expected so much of her. The pressure would drive me crazy. Now that iThink back on it, if iReally tried; iCould have lived up to those expectations. But iGuess my fear of never being good enough always caused me to crawl into my shell &cry about the world demanding too much. Now look at me. Saika Thee Incredible. iCan do anything iPut my mind to, and on most days iWant to do EVERYTHING! lol.
Another amazing thing for me- is this whole "Popularity" thing. iWouldnt have thought about this to add if it weren't for Miles[mystarboy]. We were talking about this the other day. After iTransfered out of John Jay; iOfficially got a fresh start. iWas the new girl. Of course iDrew attention being the new girl. But my personality shutdown and refusal to make friends gave people the opportunity [eventually] to like me for me* first. That was something iNever got the chance to experience. Fact from that? All the people who adored my life in my old school, I'm not even in contact with. except for Tanisha, Britt &Tyrone.

However, this post is really supposed to be about my expectations for the year!
Please Note : iFeel OLD ! lol . well - Grown* hehe . I'm going to be 18 !

Random // When my 17th Bday hit, iSeriously caught panic & emotional attacks . About being scared to grow up; and how all I've been doing is "growing up" - feeling like iNever had a childhood. iMean yeah, iNever played spin the bottle. iNever ate glue. iNever went to a prom &I've probably only been to about 6 [thatsstarboy'sfavenumberlol] parties in my lifetime. But iGot to be the pink power ranger when iWas 6. iFound out the United States didn't have a king, so iCouldnt be a princess. iGot my first kiss in the 7th grade. &iWent through a rebellious phase. So I'm happy with everything my past holds =]

This Year is going to be great! Why? Because isayso!
- The band teacher wants me to join band. So I'll be starting on trumpet and I'm really excited for that! QuincyJones practically CREATED the trumpet!
- Expanding chorus; iWant us to do great things this year. &you're BUGGING if you thought iWasnt running for president again =]
- iSay this like every year... but iNEED to stop being so damn lazy with school work. seriously.
- This year I'm going to apply to all the music colleges iWant to go to. Without fear that iWont get in. Because any school would be lucky* to have me.
- I'm going to be more involved with my classmates. Or try to. [¬onlybecauseallmyfriendsgraduated]
- Boyfriend? Nah. iHonestly don't need such a big distraction this year. Plus, iHave my crush to keep me occupied. &he's not close enough to be a major distraction =] so it works!

All in all, this year is going to be hard work and fun. oh- and when iTake the SATs with a great score to show off, iWill let you all know.
ofcourse I'm afraid that iMay not be as smart as everyone thinks iAm. Like what if iDo horribly? This is one of those tests that show how smart you are right? I'm Usually a good test taker...
Like how iNEVER went to English last year, then got a 72 on the regents [cuz ididnt do 2 essays.] or how iNever paid attention in Spanish [when iActually went] and got a 80 on the final exam? Orrrrr how iNever went to Math and always showed up for a test & got like 90's.
[iGuess you see the pattern of a BAD student last year? smh]

but yeah! iThink I'm done here.



--&ily. x__MG

Labels: bince, geek, music, saika, senior, universe, year